West From Home

                                                           April 19th 1872

  
               The sun was barely up when the Barnes family set out for the west. The air was cool and crisp and the ground was still damp with morning dew. They packed everything they owned into their little covered wagon and left behind the little log cabin they called home. Eliza and Nicholas were sad to leave the home that they had shared so many memories in. From the early days of their marriage to the joyous births of their sons. But they were hopeful that they would be happy in their new home. There were new memories to be made now. Eliza watched baby Jonathan in her arms. Look at how peaceful he looks as he sleeps unaware of the things going on around him, dreaming little baby dreams. Thomas and Eli were in the back of the wagon playing a game of some sort without any cares in the world. How young and innocent they were, she wished they could stay this way forever. If only things were that easy. Nicholas was sitting beside her hands on the reins, eyes intent on the path which laid before them. They had talked endlessly the night before about where they would settle and about how frightening and thrilling it all was. She had never seen Nicholas with so much vigor, so much enthusiasm. The way he gleamed as he talked of the opportunities they were to have. To be completely honest she didn't particularly want to leave their home, and venture out into unknown land. In fact the very thought made her want to cry. But she tried her best to hide it and put on her brave face for Nicholas. She only wished she didn't have to say good-bye to her family and friends. She took comfort in knowing that they would write her and keep her in the loop on all the things happening with her loved ones back home. But no matter what happened she knew she had the four people she needed most, the ones for whom she'd travel to the moon and back. They were her life, and they were more than enough.
 

You don't belong with me

   Where did it all go wrong? That was the single question I just couldn't get out of my head. I had been looking through all of the text messages, all of the photographs, and all of my diary entries for the past three hours. Still no answers. Grady and I had been the perfect couple. He was the one, or so I thought. He was well liked by my family, my friends, even my dog Max, who would only let me touch him. We had the same values and beliefs. He was the one guy who really understood me. And I don't mean like he didn't ask me every five minutes what on earth I was talking about, but like he knew who I was and not the person I let others see. I thought we would be together forever, I guess I thought wrong. "I just don't love you anymore, I'm sorry Beth". Never had any words cut so deep. People who say "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me" don't know the all too real effect words can have. Even though he doesn't love me anymore I still love him, and I guess that's the most painful part. Loving someone when they don't want you anymore, when they don't know you anymore, when they don't love you anymore. And now I know that good things don't last, and time goes too fast. If I had known how things would turn out, that I would only be hurt in the end, would I have changed anything? Maybe. But I guess things are better left as they are. It would only have hurt more if I had married him, had kids, and then he decide to leave. At least he had the decency to let me go now. And all of a sudden I saw things not as I wanted to see them but for what they really were. I grabbed my phone off the dresser, took one last look at his seven digit number and before I could go back I pressed delete. I then proceeded to delete all my messages. I logged into my Facebook account, went to my inbox and looked up every message Grady ever sent me, from those late night conversations to his last message, the dreaded "we need to talk" one. I selected all of them and pressed delete. Next came all the photos. This was the hardest part by far, seeing how happy we were. But pictures are only snapshots, a snippet of life, they never tell the complete story. There's so much more under the surface that I couldn't see, or maybe just what I didn't want to see. Well I was finished with the photos, the only thing left to do was delete Grady. I typed in his name and clicked on his page. There he was. With his usual goofy profile picture, and brand new changed relationship status. Look at those girls, practically throwing themselves at him. "Oh Grady, I'm so sorry! If you ever need to talk, I'm here". Gag me with a spoon! I scrolled down the page and clicked on remove from friends. Wow! It was like I had released this huge weight. It was truly better this way, to just not look back. I don't know what the future may bring, but I know one thing is for sure. I'm done with my past.     

A Day At The Museum

   Yesterday my mom, my brother, and I all went to visit the Virginia museum. I had been to this museum before but never with my brother. Let's just say it's a whole new experience  with my brother, bless his heart! I've always loved museums. My favorite exhibit was Art Novae. But I especially liked this replica of a bedroom which looks like it's from the 1800s. I also love the Mary Cassatt collection. I remember as a child my mom had this beautiful print of her's in the sitting room. We all had a great time, and after the museum we went to eat at Anna's. It was a very pleasant day which I for one much enjoyed! And I know my mom and brother did too!

I am art.

We are art.

I love this room so much, I would even decorate my house like this room

"Yeah I know, I'm awesome"

Model Pose

Wedding Morning Part 5(Epilogue)

18 Months Later

"Thank you" Peter said as he grabbed his coffee off the counter. He proceeded to sit down in one of the plush olive green chairs. Boy was it good to be back! This coffee shop had been one of his favorite places, so of course when he got in town this was first on his list. He opened up his laptop and logged into his Gmail. Junk mail, every bit of it. Oh well! It was a blessing to have even junk mail. Ever since his illness he had learned to treat everything as a blessing. He was told there was no hope, or so they said. He went to this support group for people dealing with terminal illnesses. The leader of it recommended him to Dr.Blankenship. At first he was leary of him, figured he was just gonna give him false hope. But he told him about this experimental treatment they were trying over in Europe, and they were only chosing a select few. He didn't have anything to lose. He was dying, he left the love of his life at the altar, what worse could happen? So he packed his bags and boarded a plane. And now 18 months after he was diagnosed he was back home, tumor free. He had been in remission for almost a year now. He had been in town for about a day. He was staying with a buddy for the time being, just until he found a place, and a job. He hadn't seen Mary yet, he doubt she wanted to see him. He never told her why he called off the wedding. He wanted more than anything to explain himself to her, to tell her he still loved her. Maybe it wasn't too late for them. Maybe someone had told her why he left.Maybe she understood. And maybe, just maybe she still loved him. He sure hoped she still did. He took one last look at his e-mails and started to gather his things. He looked up for one split second out the window and saw the back of a woman's head. Could it be? No, he was only seeing things! Oh go after her you fool! He ran out of the coffee shop and out onto the sidewalk. He searched for her face and saw her still walking forward. "Mary!" he called out. She stopped in her tracks and swiftly turned around. He felt his heart sink into his stomach. Then she realized who had called her name and looked at him as though he was dead to her. And before he knew it she was gone. He stood there almost in a trance for what seemed like forever. Now he knew there was no going back. No trying to make her understand. No spending his life with her. She was still as beautiful as ever, if not more beautiful. But the ring on her lovely hand which rested on the reason we could never be made me realize there was no going bakc. I wonder what it will will be. I hope it has her eyes.

Wedding Morning Part 4(Groom's view)

"Come on Peter! What are you waiting for?" Startled by his best man he jumped to his feet and tried to collect himself.I really should stop doing that or people will know something is wrong. "You're not thinking about backing out of this, are you?" "No!...no! Of course not!" Peter replied. "Well then move it! We're already behind schedule, and if we don't hurry Valerie will chew us both out" So they both hurried over to the sanctuary. The Reverend lead him up to the altar and soon the wedding processional was beginning. Wow it was finally happening! He had been waiting for this day with anticipation for so long, but now it just didn't seem to matter anymore. He was dying. He was about to marry the one girl he wanted to spend forever with and all he had was eight months. A brain tumor, of all the heinous things to take him away from her. How could he tell her? How could he let her sit there and watch him die? It wasn't like he was gonna get any better. Dr.Foreman said surgery was too risky and chemo would only leave him bald and weak with little chances of recovery. And there she was. He was completely transfixed by her. She was absolutely amazing. She was easy going, compassionate, and an all around good person. A person who didn't deserve to watch her husband die. It was time for the Reverend to speak. "Dearly Beloved: We are gathered here, in the presence of God and of this company, that Peter and Mary may be united in holy matrimony.Who presents this woman in marriage?" "Her Mother and I do" Her Father squeezed her hand and gently let go."If anyone has reason why these two shall not be married speak now or forever hold your peace" The church was so quiet you could hear a pen drop. "Well then let us proceed" "No!" Peter wasn't sure if that had come out of his own mouth. It had. "Peter what are you doing?!" "I can't! I'm sorry, one day you'll understand" "Understand what?! Peter you're not making sense" "I'm so sorry. Just remember I still love you Mary" And with that he ran down the aisle and straight out the double doors. Once he was out he frantically searched his pockets for his car keys. He unlocked it, hopped in, and started the car. As he started to pull out of the church parking lot he looked back at Mary on the front steps in her wedding gown, panic on her face. That was the hardest thing he had ever done. But he knew it was for the best. He'd rather have her hate him than become a widow at twenty-four.

Wedding Morning Part 3(Bride's view)

Where could he be?! Peter was suppose to be at the church an hour ago. Why wasn't he here already?! Mary was pacing in the bridal room thinking of all of the possible reasons why he wasn't here yet. Maybe he was stuck in traffic, or maybe his doctor's appointment ran late. Or maybe he had just up and decided he didn't want to be married and bought a one-way plane ticket to Ireland. Yeah stuck in traffic seemed a lot more logical. "Oh Val!What am I gonna do?! Peter isn't here and we're suppose to start in thirty minutes" Valerie wrapped her arms around Mary and tried her best to console her. Not only had Valerie been the best maid of honor a girl could ask for, she had been her best friend since the third grade. There was no one she would have wanted by her side today more than her. Other than her parents and Peter of course, if he decided to make an appearance at their wedding! Valerie pulled back from Mary, wiping Mary's tears. "Don't worry about a thing! He'll show up, he's crazy about you" "Yeah you're right, he'll be here" she said. She sauntered over to the full-length mirror and started retouching her make-up. She knew she should have just let him put off that doctor's appointment until after the wedding and honeymoon. What difference would a few days make? She had just been so worried about him lately. He had been having migraines for the past couple of weeks and most recently black-outs. He had been putting it off and putting it off for way too long, and this was the only time Dr.Foreman had available before the wedding. She would rather him be late she guessed than have him put it off any longer. In came her Father. "He's here and dressed! You ready?" She turned from the mirror and took a deep breath. "Always." She walked to her Father, he kissed her forehead and lowered her veil. How stupid it was to get so worked up about that. Peter was finally here, and they were going to be just fine. As long as they had each other nothing could be that bad.

Wedding Morning Part 2(Groom's view)

Peter was patiently sitting in the lobby. It was quite quaint for a doctor's office, and even with it's tranquil nature it was still too idyllic for what it was. He had been feeling rather lethargic the last couple of weeks so Mary suggested he see his doctor. He had resisted at first thinking it was all just balderdash, but Mary was very persuasive. That was one of the things he liked most about her. She was his refuge, his solace. He met her at freshman orientation, the girl with rosy cheeks and a flower in her hair. At first the relationship was purely platonic, but it had developed into something so much more. He finally had something tangible to love. You see his parents kicked him out at sixteen, fed up with his incessant partying, drinking, bad grades, and run-ins with the law. If it wasn't for his Aunt Grace who took him in and straightened him out he'd be nowhere. His parents still wouldn't speak to him. For a long time he'd send them letters, but after about sixty letters had been sent back with "return to sender" marked on them he just gave up. So Aunt Grace was the only family he had left, that was until he met Mary. Being with Mary was like coming home. One time they were sitting on the sofa watching Friday Night Lights, her head was on his shoulder and his arm was wrapped around her. And suddenly he had an epiphany! She was the girl he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. So he asked her to marry him and she said yes. And here he was nine months later, day of his wedding waiting in the doctor's office. There came Dr.Foreman calling him back for his appointment. He got up and walked to where he held open the door, not knowing why he had such a bad feeling. After all it couldn't be anything serious.